Messy or manicured, which will it be? What’s the difference? Why does it matter? Is this about my lawn or my life?
It doesn’t really matter; the thoughts are the same. What are the thoughts? They came to me the other day. I was running through the neighborhood getting some exercise. My dog, Harry, was at my side. I glanced to my right and noticed a beautifully landscaped lawn. There were islands of colorful flowers, trees in full bloom with bright green leaves, perfectly trimmed grass, and another bed of flowers encircled by precisely trimmed grass. As I admired it I thought back to a time when that’s what I wanted in my life; a perfectly manicured yard, home and life. It was at that moment I chuckled as I realized that’s not what I long for anymore. It’s too clean; too precise, structured, controlled; it represents boundaries and have to’s; I have to mow the lawn to keep it manicured, I have to trim the bushes, prune the trees, raise my children this way or that way, act this way or that way. Where’s the joy in this? Where’s the fun?
And there came a question, “What do I want?” Hmmm, it’s really more about what I’ve learned to enjoy and have now grown to embrace; a lawn, a home, a life with less “have to’s” and more “lived in” spaces. What does that mean, you might ask? Well, I remember a time, many times, when I’d come home from work, walk into the house and see dishes on the table, on the countertops, in the sink, magazines and newspapers strung about on the couch, the chair, on the floor, dog hair clinging to the corner of cabinets, fur balls floating across the floor from the cat who was lazily draped across one of the dog pillows under the window. It all looked so, “Messy”. And then I read something by Eckhart Tolle. I don’t remember exactly how he wrote it but it was something like, “what if you changed your thoughts about the “messy” house and thought of it as the “lived in” house; the house with people you love, animals you love, living life, doing things they enjoy! WOW! Something so simple was so profound! Don’t get me wrong, I still like a “tidy” home with dishes done at least once, if not twice a day, floors swept and vacuumed regularly, books and magazines thrown in their rightly place in the basket on the floor. The difference? It’s not “manicured” neatly like the lawn I admired the other day. Rather it’s like a field of wild flowers; the seeds thrown randomly to land where they may and grow into a beautiful field of colors and sizes; not organized with precision. It’s like a manicured, wild, beautiful mess. Just like the life going on in our home; the living that’s happening there and the living that’s happening within me. The joy I feel. It’s savoring the moments of what’s here in the now; the present. It’s embracing what I’m living today, feeling today, experiencing today. The manicured house, life and yard were more about living for what others would see, think and perceive about me. The messy stuff is the real stuff; the people and events I learn from; the appreciation for the people in my life. I don’t always like it but I always learn from it and I always grow from it. The wisdom that comes of it adds fulfillment to my life.
Today, now, in the moment, I’m living for me, for the gratefulness of the people in my life, the accomplishments, the love and joy; sometimes it’s manicured; sometimes it’s messy; it’s a little wild and all good. Just like the lawn, I keep growing!
What about you? What do you choose? Manicured or Messy?
It doesn’t really matter; the thoughts are the same. What are the thoughts? They came to me the other day. I was running through the neighborhood getting some exercise. My dog, Harry, was at my side. I glanced to my right and noticed a beautifully landscaped lawn. There were islands of colorful flowers, trees in full bloom with bright green leaves, perfectly trimmed grass, and another bed of flowers encircled by precisely trimmed grass. As I admired it I thought back to a time when that’s what I wanted in my life; a perfectly manicured yard, home and life. It was at that moment I chuckled as I realized that’s not what I long for anymore. It’s too clean; too precise, structured, controlled; it represents boundaries and have to’s; I have to mow the lawn to keep it manicured, I have to trim the bushes, prune the trees, raise my children this way or that way, act this way or that way. Where’s the joy in this? Where’s the fun?
And there came a question, “What do I want?” Hmmm, it’s really more about what I’ve learned to enjoy and have now grown to embrace; a lawn, a home, a life with less “have to’s” and more “lived in” spaces. What does that mean, you might ask? Well, I remember a time, many times, when I’d come home from work, walk into the house and see dishes on the table, on the countertops, in the sink, magazines and newspapers strung about on the couch, the chair, on the floor, dog hair clinging to the corner of cabinets, fur balls floating across the floor from the cat who was lazily draped across one of the dog pillows under the window. It all looked so, “Messy”. And then I read something by Eckhart Tolle. I don’t remember exactly how he wrote it but it was something like, “what if you changed your thoughts about the “messy” house and thought of it as the “lived in” house; the house with people you love, animals you love, living life, doing things they enjoy! WOW! Something so simple was so profound! Don’t get me wrong, I still like a “tidy” home with dishes done at least once, if not twice a day, floors swept and vacuumed regularly, books and magazines thrown in their rightly place in the basket on the floor. The difference? It’s not “manicured” neatly like the lawn I admired the other day. Rather it’s like a field of wild flowers; the seeds thrown randomly to land where they may and grow into a beautiful field of colors and sizes; not organized with precision. It’s like a manicured, wild, beautiful mess. Just like the life going on in our home; the living that’s happening there and the living that’s happening within me. The joy I feel. It’s savoring the moments of what’s here in the now; the present. It’s embracing what I’m living today, feeling today, experiencing today. The manicured house, life and yard were more about living for what others would see, think and perceive about me. The messy stuff is the real stuff; the people and events I learn from; the appreciation for the people in my life. I don’t always like it but I always learn from it and I always grow from it. The wisdom that comes of it adds fulfillment to my life.
Today, now, in the moment, I’m living for me, for the gratefulness of the people in my life, the accomplishments, the love and joy; sometimes it’s manicured; sometimes it’s messy; it’s a little wild and all good. Just like the lawn, I keep growing!
What about you? What do you choose? Manicured or Messy?
